Trying to Have the Best of Both Worlds

Dear world,

There are a number of things about your behavior that I'd like to address.

What I really don't like is when you try to hold two opposite views and pretend that they're complimentary: (a) Christians are goody-two-shoes who can't see evil and horror when it's right in front of their faces, and (b) Christians are scheming, low-down, wicked hypocrites who insist on pretending that they're really moral and upright - more than the rest of us struggling sinners. Which is it? Take your pick. You're always telling us that we have to choose, while also pretending that there really is no choice but death and horror. Why don't you admit that this is what you've chosen. This is where your choices without God lie - death, and horror.

What I also really dislike is that you love to point out where Christians go wrong, and then when any sort of wandering finger of blame works itself around to you, you go all prim-and-properly moral. "Don't judge", you say, "Jesus wouldn't do it". This is completely ignoring the fact that, once again, you're asserting two opposite views: (a) Jesus did all that was nice and moral and proper and kind, but (b) we can't trust the Bible when it says anything about Jesus acting like a Judge. Somebody else must have monkeyed with the words.

On the one hand, we're supposed to believe that you can sneer at everything written in an ancient book, or airily waft away every view of Jesus that doesn't agree with your own views. On the other hand, we're also supposed to believe your assertions when you pull out bits of the Bible that happen to suit your pre-existing views - while accepting blistering rebukes whenever we pull out bits of the Bible to prove a cherished belief. Yet you won't accept that you have any views, or at the very height of admittance, that everyone is tarred with the same awful human brush of bias. If that's so, why is it so important to point out that Christians tend to be inconsistent? If you can stand on the Bible to point at Christians, do you realize that they should be allowed to do the same? Otherwise, there's that awful word "unfair" that can be flashed across your reality like a very unwelcome beam of light. You claim God is unfair, by allowing evil into the world. Is that any excuse for you to go around pointing fingers and quoting bits of Bible verses, while not attempting to listen to anything that the Book says? If God is unfair for allowing wicked humans to trample around the world and on each other, is it also unfair that He gave you life? You certainly didn't give it to yourself.

I can admit that I'm a hypocrite - Jesus makes me confess this on a regular basis. He tells me to love you even when you're alternately smiling and trying to tear down my faith with everything you have, and I really object to that. I can also admit that I have needs that fall outside of anything included in the five senses, and that I'm woefully inadequate to provide much for myself. A flawed human being does not make much of a towering pillar of strength.

What you're doing is trying to have the best of both worlds - God's and Satan's. You want the power to rule yourself (and maybe others) without any Divine interference. You want the ability to point to someone and say they're inconsistent, while not admitting your inconsistencies. I share that same tendency - that's how I know what you're doing. No one spots a phony better than a former phony who's only halfway toward the cure.

If you get all offended about this letter, good. Maybe we can have a real discussion, instead of you being allowed to have all the laughs at our expense, while we're supposed to sit with our mouths shut, emitting an aura of kindliness via a wistful and heavenly expression. If you don't like that, it's kind of tough beans. When God gets through with you, you'll have wished that you listened, and turned the searchlight of truth on yourself. It's better to do it now, rather than have it done to you by an Almighty and Perfect Person who knows you better than you want to know yourself - in front of the rest of the world. Everyone will be squirming. Everyone will have really superior thoughts about their neighbors until it's time for the beam of light to reach their own life. No one will escape, and everyone will bow the knee.

Think about that, next time that you pull out one of the three verses you know. You just might be hearing them - and some that you don't know - for all Eternity. I may not be that great at loving people the way that they seem to wish to be 'loved' - i.e., allowed to do whatever they please without question. What I do know is that I wouldn't wish Hell on my worst enemy, but that it's going to happen to whoever doesn't admit that their personal habit of offending God is the highest and worst evil of mankind.

Book Review: Schaeffer's 'The Great Evangelical Disaster'

Most of Schaeffer's writing is easily read and accessible - that's what makes him a good introductory author for theological topics. Here's a one-sentence summary of the book: If evangelical believers don't know how to convey the truth in love, they will accommodate the world and commit theological suicide.

These are a few points that might be easy to overlook, because he presents them in simple terms:

• The world often knows what's at stake, and better expresses the divide between belief and unbelief, than Christians do. (Why is that? He doesn't say, but I'm guessing it's because Christians often and erroneously think that because Jesus crushed Satan's head, the spiritual war is over. It's not.) 
• Evangelicals who get confused between 'showing love to the brethren' and 'giving up [truth] to get along' do more damage than the world.
• If we do not fight the spirit of compromise within our own churches, we will continually lose battles until self-proclaimed Christians are nothing more than spiritual zombies.

• Theological, church-wide statements, far from being mere formal expressions of intellectual assent or dissent on difficult topics, have real-life applications: abortion, marriage, homosexuality, creationism or evolutionism, etc.
• Repeated important word and topic: "the watershed". Schaeffer explains the divide that happens when water falls on an area, flowing either to the right or the left. What starts as a small difference, in scope and perspective, becomes a large difference. 

• Far from pushing his readers to exhaustively examine every small detail (and Christian) for error, he repeats the idea of the Double Task: "[The Christian] has to practice both God's holiness and God's love." 
• Just as holiness without love is harshness, love without holiness is compromise. Both are grave watershed errors.
• These errors allow Satan to encourage Christians to swing from one arc of the pendulum to the other, from compromise to harshness and back again. "The devil never gives us the luxury of fighting on only one front, and this will always be the case." 
• The costly nature of showing love to the bretheren includes monetary losses, or any other kinds of losses, because it's one of the true ways that the world can see whether or not we are Christ's disciples. (John 13:33-35) 
• While the Parable of the Samaritan shows the costly love we are to have for our neighbors regardless of their faith (since all men are made in God's image), our true test of discipleship comes out as we love our fellow believers even more (Galatians 6:10). It's a both-and, not an either-or. 

Love and truth, based on the Rock. Go and do likewise. :)

Amazon Book Review - "Crucify! Why the Crowd Killed Jesus"

Like the author, I'd always been a bit puzzled as to why the crowds 'suddenly' seemed to turn on Jesus, after waving palm branches and shouting “Hallelujuah”.

                                           Book: Crucify! Why the Crowds Killed Jesus

Even after having read the gospels multiple times, I didn't quite get the full picture of how Jesus intentionally and continually pointed out human failings and flaws to his audience, who clearly were happy to be fed and healed - but didn't want God's Son telling them what to do. More importantly, they didn't want to be told that their fond ideas of God, who He was, what He required (heart change along with living out the Commandments), and what He came to earth to accomplish - were all wrong. Sadly, that doesn't seem all that unfamiliar to those of us who follow Him, slowly and haltingly and occasionally with much complaint. (“Lord, are you at this time going to restore the kingdom to Israel?”)

I'd always known that occasionally the crowds in Nazareth or around the temple were enraged enough to want to stone Him, but the author makes it very clear that part of Jesus' intent was to poke at their issues of pride, self-deceit, and hypocrisy...starting but not ending with their Pharisee and Sadducee leaders. The author makes it abundantly clear that there is no possible way, based on a thorough reading of the Gospels, to just see Jesus as a self-proclaimed agent of political and social change. HIs kingdom was not of this world, and He frequently used means that wouldn't make sense for someone trying to wow the crowds long enough to snatch political power.

Whenever the crowds tried to coerce or haggle with Jesus, he challenged their assumptions and ideas. They would try to force him to become king, at the improper time, and without consulting His Father. When He tells them point-blank that they only seek Him for more physical food, they ask to be given the ability to “work the works of God”. When He says their work is to believe, they throw the question back and cynically ask for a sign – even after having been fed with 5,000 loaves. “Our fathers ate the manna in the desert; as it is written, 'He gave them bread from heaven to eat'.” Unlike the Samaritan woman at the well, who first asked for the water of eternal life and then believed, these noble bread-seekers complain about Jesus when He says that He is the eternal Bread of Life.

They really don't like it when Jesus says that there is no side road to salvation. “Therefore I have said to you that no one can come to Me unless it has been granted to him by My Father.” One, that's offensive because it puts all the power in God's hands, not in man. Two, that's doubly offensive because birth and privilege don't matter – if the Father hasn't allowed access to the Messiah, you won't get it. No wonder many of the disciples turned around, leaving the original twelve astounded at the turn of events.

The text does not say this last bit. I'm just putting myself in their shoes, watching Jesus (a) wow the crowds with the food miracle and His dynamic words, (b) see Jesus evade their attempts to make Him their leader, (c) see the crowds have a very sharp and public debate with Jesus, and (d) see a whole crowd of seeming Jesus-followers melt away.

The only difficulty that I have with this book is the author's habit of doing what I just did – read meaning into the text. Sometimes it's difficult to spot the difference between the author's realistic imagination, and what the text actually says. It's good to read the book while flipping through to the noted chapter and its context.

Besides the clear rebuttals about Jesus being 'only' a good moral Teacher or political activist, the author clearly shows that the Pharisees were not the problem during Christ's time on earth. Man's sinful rebellion against God is the ultimate problem.  

Movie Illustrations on The Flesh, The World, and The Devil

I'd like to have titled this post "Random Angry Thoughts About Unfairness" or "Letter to the World...." followed by a lot of swear words.

Really, it's amazing how the human heart can turn into an inferno of frustration, anger, and just plain meanness at the drop of a hat. Sometimes, I wonder if all the Bible studies and prayer times and psalm sings in the world do a whole lot to turn us (mainly me) into anything other than Spawn of Satan when something goes wrong.

Something Always Goes Wrong

One of my 100 favorite films, 28 Days, has a great supply of quotes and illustrations because the main character (Sandra Bullock) is dealing with addiction. I deal with a sin addiction on a daily basis, so it's not too hard to relate. One of the counselors relates the common scenario of making a promise not to indulge in the addiction, "and then something would happen - or nothing would happen - and I'd get that feeling. And you all know what that feeling is." The hands shake, the eyes bulge, and you've just Got to Have That Something, whatever it is. Having it doesn't solve the problem, just sets you up for more issues later.

The World Is A Bitterly Hard Place

Ebenezer Scrooge is both my favorite and least favorite character in all filmdom, mostly based on the best Christmas Carol film ever.  "I think the world is becoming a very hard and cruel place, Mr. Marley. One must steel oneself to survive it, and not be crushed under with the weak and infirm." As Scrooge gets more involved in 'real life', his face gets colder and more impersonal, ostensibly stronger and better able to deal with the hard facts of the world both condemning and screaming after wealth, crushing the lives of the poor.

However, it's the kind Alice whose 'gentle tongue breaks a bone' with some real truth: Scrooge is operating out of greed and fear. Changing to meet the harshness of the world only makes him cruel and self-deceived about his inability to be content, or suffer despite obstacles. Fearing to be crushed under the pitiless wheels of the world, he merely crushes others in his haste to get away and survive. She knows that survival is not the highest good.

The Devil's Disappearing Act

You might think that the only good illustrations about Satan come from horror films - really, that's the last place you should go. He's far too obvious in his effects there, not the least of which is that strange and horrified addictive fascination with evil that horror films tend to create.

Other than the extremely frightening depictions of Satan's voice and stare in The Passion, the best illustration of how the Devil operates (I think) is in The Devil's Advocate. He's always a liar, from nurturing rebellious thoughts about God 'making up' rules to suit His own fancies, to claiming that he has power he doesn't have, to claiming to be man's helper - helping us reach our highest potential without God. That's always the catch - God has to be left out for us to really flourish.

Satan takes the truth about himself, and puts it on God. He's the accuser, he's the one who stands at the brink of the abyss and tells us we shouldn't have done what he suggested as a great idea, he's the one who plays with us and rejoices when we fall. And then he blames God, and hopes we'll blame Him too.

Faith often reasserts itself after I've nearly lost the battle. Perhaps God will be gracious, and allow me to win sometimes without coming to the edge of the pit. In heaven, I shall laugh and not cry, there will not be any weeping or gnashing of teeth.

I lift my eyes to the hills, from whence comes my aid, my safety, and my Rock.

Formula For The Good Life

Working my way through the First Book of Peter, internally sighing over his insistence on pointing out all of my worst areas of sanctification (suffering without retaliation, submitting to authorities, blessing my enemies, etc), I came across this:

Formula For the Good Life

"Whoever would love life and see good days must (1) keep their tongue from evil and (2) their lips from deceitful speech. They must (3) turn from evil and (4) do good; they must (5) seek peace and (6) pursue it." 

Hah, I thought, no problem here! I've been trudging on the great Road of Sanctification for a good many years now, and I've got this turning away from evil down pat....ho boy. Apparently there's a pride issue that yet again has to be taken to the throne. See what I mean? Peter, always pointing out everyone's flaws (mine).

First Step - Keep My Tongue From Evil

Since I now work from home, that's usually not a problem unless someone calls on the phone or my husband comes home. Then the mouth opens - then there's opportunity for all sorts of things mentioned in James 3. Sadly, keeping it shut all the time isn't really an option, as I'm far beyond hope for a Reformed nunnery.

Second Step - Keep My Lips From Deceitful Speech

This step was more of a poser. It's not as broad, and I'm really not sure that my habit of half-truthing it is really acceptable in the Lord's sight. Apparently, He's a little more keen on me keeping away from both active and underhanded evil, which brings up the third point: turning from evil.

Third Step - Turn From Evil

When I first started crawling toward the cross with real intent - not because it would get me points with the parents - I thought I was doing pretty well to just not do what I'd done before. Perhaps my former lifestyle (I Peter 5) wasn't carousing and orgies (unless you can count rebelliously reading until 3 a.m.) but I wasn't really old enough for that, plus our social circles didn't really offer those opportunities. My introvert orgies were sneaky and secretive and all on the inside. Combine that with a lack of desire to confess sin and ask for help, and these habits can become lethal - especially if you have a habit towards building up pride via knowledge.

Fourth Step - Do Good

A good illustration might be the difference between toddler faith and teenager faith. It's not just enough to walk away from evil, there's the replacement factor of turning from stealing to giving, turning from gossiping to becoming compassionate and service-oriented, turning from lying to telling salty truth with grace.

Fifth Step - Seek Peace

Sure, who doesn't want peace? Well, people who like the noise and pride of life and indulging in orgies - and introverts who want peace on their own terms with no one around to mess it up. Really, it's just a party of one gone mad. If you haven't been in a habit of turning your feet from evil and then doing good - which necessarily involved other people - then peace will be really hard to find. Real peace necessitates communion with the Peace-Giver. (Now I sound like Max Lucado.)

Sixth Step - Pursue Peace

If peace were a deer, you'd have to quietly and slowly stalk it through the underbrush, learning how to place your feet just so (on the right path), and move in rhythm with the surrounding area, so that you won't scare off the Peace Hart. Mature believers are quite serious and focused when they want something, they know how to quietly and doggedly pursue. It's toddlers and teenagers that crash around a lot more, drowning out peace with excitement and discoveries. A really good hunter, or pursuer, will sometimes run and sometimes walk, but never turn aside until the prize is won.

That's where I want to be.

The Counter-Cultural Activity of Prayer

After a small gathering of prayer warriors this Wednesday, I fell to thinking about how prayer that shaped the Western world is completely against the values of our modern Western world:

• Action - Prayer often feels useless because the activity is done by God.
• Speed - There's no way to utilize any tool to speed up God's responses.
• Temper - "The wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God". 
• Personal opinion - One of prayer's big goals is to focus you on hearing God and obeying God, and actively turning your back on your own desires and thoughts.
• Individual achievement - This counts for nothing with the Father, Son, and Holy Ghost. They created the world in 6 days, and invested personal effort in saving children that weren't interested in obeying them.
• Crowd approval - Jesus excoriated the Pharisees for making long prayers in the marketplace so that everyone could applaud their holiness. Daniel won a court case appeal (via lions) for his habit of keeping a window open while praying, while 120 satraps lost their lives. 
• Rebellion - this is "as the sin of witchcraft", and hampers prayer. 
• Anti-authoritarian - God is the authority. You're not. Submission is essential.
• Self-actualization - Humility, begging for forgiveness, and admittance of sin are in complete opposition to "I can do it all myself" - especially since many Scriptural examples of prayer's power came with people in groups (Pentecost, Peter's release from prison, Solomon's dedication of the Temple)
• Dialogue - God does answer, but He doesn't given an immediate verbal response, He often uses silence, or we have to figure out what He wants by (a) waiting, (b) listening, and (c) reading His Word. The whole book of Nehemiah shows individuals and groups repenting of sin, describing God's amazing attributes, and making respectful requests. Not once did God say "why yes, that's a good plan". They had to figure out His answer from what happened after the prayer.
• Personality - God created it. See "individual achievement". 
• Quick fixes - God let Abraham and Sarah sit on a promise of His (for a son) for 25 years. Also see the Parable of the Persistent Widow.
• Aesthetics - Prayer can be heard in prison or at home. ("God, be merciful to me, a sinner.")
• Positive thinking - Nehemiah's prayer for wall restoration and Hannah's prayer for a child were answered, along with Elisha's prayer for blindness of the Assyrians, Elijah's prayer to burn up a sacrifice to shame the priests of Baal, 
• Cheap grace - Prayers won't be heard by unrighteous men, those with violent hands, or by men who treat their wives badly (1 Peter 3:7). Also, selfish motives (James 4:3), lack of attention to His commandments (Proverbs 28:9), unrepented sin (Psalm 66:18), lack of faith (James 1:5-7) and lack of forgiveness (Mark 11:25) are all hindrances to prayer. In fact, you may get curses instead of blessings for these abominations. 

Our King likes to be approached regularly with acknowledgements of His person, understanding of His grace, and attention to His will - before we make our requests known. At the same time, "Abba, Father" and spread-out hands can work, while the Holy Spirit makes intercession with groanings that cannot be uttered. He's always ready to hear a contrite heart. 

Thoughts on Rick Warren, John Piper, and Sobriety

Every Christian struggles with thinking more of themselves than they ought (or else Romans 12:3 wouldn't have so sternly warned believers on 'opinion sobriety'). It would be harder, while fans scream your name, in church and out of church, to keep a realistic view of yourself as a redeemed sinner. Even so, I cringed a little to hear the words "sacred trust" handed admiringly from one big name to another: John Piper to Rick Warren. http://www.desiringgod.org/blog/posts/john-piper-interviews-rick-warren-on-doctrine

Quite honestly, I found myself pleasantly surprised by Warren's answers on several basic questions. It seems that he came out of a theological hall with more knowledge - and desire to serve - than most institutions give to their students. I began listening in the same way that I shop at major department stores in malls - "how horribly inflated are these prices" - and came away thinking that the $1,500 St. John dress may be quite a bargain at $250. (After looking through racks of goods 'worth' thousands, your judgment gets impaired.) He believes in a literal hell, God as a sovereign, and the necessity of believing in Christ as the only way to truth and life. Well and good.

At the same time, I would not at all be willing to attend Saddleback regularly, knowing that the minister will water down or edge around explanations so that more seekers can go away with a slight interest in cracking open a Bible. If a person is being drawn by the Spirit, they may welcome someone with clear statements about sin, righteousness, and the judgement to come. Otherwise, the polarizing nature of the Scriptures will work, and like Felix, you may be sent away to 'come again and speak another time', while the hearer hopes to bribe you with friendship and human bonding methods, to never again say those horrible words about 'judgment'.

What most bothered me - especially after hearing a rousing discussion on Piper via the "Sinners and Saints" radio program - was how enamored he seemed to be by Warren's success. It set my teeth on edge to see Piper animatedly talking about how "the world needs an authentic testimony from a living voice" - as if Moses and Jesus the final Prophet weren't enough. It also set my teeth on edge to hear Piper reiterating the same sort of fawning accolades that Warren must often get from starry-eyed media acolytes: "you're the most publicly influential pastor...in the world". There were assuring words about the necessity of humility. But it still seemed like the fascination of Harry Potter wand-maker Ollivander, who seemed to be more entranced by Voldemort's power than his evil nature.

There is nothing wrong with men of the true gospel finding large audiences of those who hunger and thirst for righteousness. Crowds clustered around Jesus, and a crowd of 3,000 gladly bent the knee to Christ after Pentecost. There is a great warrant for leaders asking each other hard questions and comparing each others' practical views of Scripture. "I withstood [Peter] to his face", says Paul in Galatians 2:11. But nowhere do I find, in either the Old or New Testament, leaders of the persecuted churches of the Way talking about their influence on the world, and how the world needs them to go forward. In every way, they talked about the reign of Christ, the person of Christ, the power of Christ as effected by the Holy Spirit, the transformation that happens when God calls to man. This sounded more like man justifying himself, for which Job was rebuked by God - and then forgiven after repentance.

Sobriety in thought is necessary for each believer, struggling against the natural desire to have a good opinion of himself. Nehemiah constantly references God's hand in both judgment and restoration, how his success is only due to the good hand of God upon him. It's hard to communicate a message to thousands of people and not miss things, or have our motives misinterpreted. But I came away from watching this interview, thinking that John Piper is just as soft on those who have experienced success, as Rick Warren is soft on unbelievers - so that the Way might appear easy. Jesus never said he'd take away the burden of the yoke, just that it would be easier under Him than under anyone else.

Aggressive Blessing

Being a pessimist makes it easy to whip out Deuteronomy's list of curses if people don't follow God's will.....but what about the dire consequences of actually following it?

“Now it shall come to pass, if you diligently obey the voice of the Lord your God, to observe carefully all His commandments which I command you today, that the Lord your God will set you high above all nations of the earth. ² And all these blessings shall come upon you and overtake you, because you obey the voice of the Lord your God" (Deut 28: 1-2).

There's those qualifiers, like "diligently obey" and "observe carefully"....but normally, when God says "come upon you", He means some sort of disaster. What He seems to be saying is, if you put time and effort into really paying attention to what He says and how to please Him, you can't help but be blessed. 

I'd like blessing to overwhelm me like a flood, and all my crops to come into my barns (working on a herb garden), and my enemies to be defeated before me. That's an attractive thought. So is the dual idea of (a) being holy so that (b) the nations are afraid of us. (It would be great if my country had enough money to lend instead of borrow, but that isn't the case.)

If some of our more flagrantly defiant leaders had justice dealt out to them, I would rejoice. But replacing one wolf with a slightly tamer wolf doesn't really decrease the danger to the sheep, it just makes them more complacent. "Well, that one's gone! Now we can get back to life as usual."

Blessings are wonderful, life-changing events. Nehemiah wasn't afraid to either pray repentance for himself and his people, OR for success in speaking to his employer. Only God could really make a king (a) give up his trusted cupbearer for who-knows-how-long, (b) fund the journey to a beaten kingdom, so that said cupbearer could (c) build a temple to his Lord God and (d) possibly become the king's worst betrayer. And He did. And we have a book about the fastest restoration work of all time - 52 days - prefaced by a lot of tears and broken walls and despair. 

Nehemiah is one of my favorite books, because it's about God's blessings. It's not that God made their enemies vanish, or magically restored the burned walls. It's not that people weren't trying to rebuild walls and the temple and their lives in Jerusalem before. But when God's ready to bless you, He'll bless you - even in the midst of people sending sly letters to the king and trying to block your efforts with fear and gossip. Satan never wants God's people to be blessed, He wants them either sinning, complacent, or ready to give up. Holding on to God's promises with both hands, keeping His commandments firmly in mind, won't always mean that blessing is around the corner. But once He decides it's blessing time, you can't get away! I look forward to that.

The Tyranny of More, the Necessity of Rest

It seems impossible to say no to that insistent voice: "...more".

This isn't simply just a marketing tool that's been overused, though we could rage about product placement in films, or the Era of Corporate Greed. It's that odd thing that drives us to eat more than is necessary ("just one more bite"), or play another online game (I'm currently addicted to Trizzle), or land one more business client. Social media merely enhances an already existing mantra in our heads - that 'more is better'.

Toddlers have the same drive toward grabbing and acquisition for its own sake, but I'm thinking about how hard it is to say "no" and feel like a worthwhile person. Being caught in a riptide of your own feelings that reaching for "more" is reaching "up", toward the light, toward expansion and progress and....we don't even know what, there's that reaction you get when you tell yourself (or others) "no". No, I don't need a new skirt on sale (that I'll never wear), I don't need to volunteer more, I don't need to give that person 'just one more chance'. Oh, that reaction. "But .... don't you WANT to do more/be more/help more?!" And the insinuation: "EVERYONE should want to be the best they can be, do until they drop."

When you're ill, you have a ready-made excuse not to do things. The sad part is, that as a fully functioning adult, I still feel that impulse to make up an illness to get out of doing, not just chores, but "things that will help". Good things, even noble things, but too much.

There are times that you do what you must, and we are in a constant spiritual war zone that seems to require everything we have and then some. But even soldiers are given leave from battle, or sent to the infirmary when they are wounded in limbs or organs. There are few legitimately accepted respite points for those in battle against darkness with no face. Somehow, you're supposed to be able to wage war via Tweets while you sleep, and contributions after your death.

There are just as many verses and passages about resting, and being content, as there are for engaging in activity. The same God who says "do not grow weary in doing good", also says "but My grace is sufficient for you". He says not to despise the day of small things, that He is the one who brings the greatness. I can see over 700 references to "rest" in the Word (via BibleGateway) and only 34 for "strive". I could use other words, but I won't. Just say no to the voice that says "but how do you know that you've researched enough?" I'm on to you.

One of my favorite converts in the Bible is Naaman the Syrian (II Kings 5), who was convinced by his wife's maidservant to seek healing for his leprosy in the land of Israel. Highly insulted by Elisha's directions given by messenger, he storms off....only to be asked by his servants to try out the prophet's directives. ("My father, if it were some great thing the prophet asked you, would you not do it?") Perhaps the centurion, asking Jesus to heal his daughter, knew what Naaman's servants did - the power of healing is in the message of the Healer, not its impressive presentation.

There's nothing impressive about rest. Seen wrongly (or done wrongly), it looks like laziness. Resting in the power of Christ looks as ridiculous as holding a Psalm sing in jail, rejoicing in the shame of being beaten for His name (Acts 16). Prayer meetings don't overflow until great disasters happen - there's nothing left to do. Naaman got the same unimpressive deal as God gave His people, in many battles. Dig ditches (II Kings 3), so your beasts will drink and you will win the war. (Really?! Ditches?) Build an altar and pour water on it, Elijah (I Kings 18), and I will bring the fire from heaven. (Prepare an altar by drowning it. Right.) God constantly tells us that He can do great things with less, and we have trouble believing that, like the Disciples. ('You want us to feed 5,000 people with a few loaves and wee fish. Sure.')

We do work as we rest in His sufficiency. We pray, we trust, we hope, we give and keep on giving, we fight against the enemy within and without. There's plenty of work to be done. We plan, and He directs the results (Proverbs 16:9). But He also gives His beloved rest, lays His sheep near a still stream, and says, "I am enough".

The Power of Misinterpretation

The problem of interpretation is not an exclusive Bible issue.

This is a human issue, stemming from Satan's primo marketing technique in the Garden of Eden. He markets death as the smart, eternal thing to do, helping the founding parents to drink the Kool-aid with him.

Today's inspiration comes from "The Power of One", a novel set in South Africa. What caught my attention was that the website clearly states a problem of interpretation. People think the title has to do with the power of one person to change the world. The author's intention was to point out the life-changing power of education, and how the whole trajectory of a child's life can turn based on one teacher's influence.

It's hard to fight against the snide, constant insinuation that the Bible is hopelessly flawed, that a vast gulf between its authors' intentions and people's perceptions must be bridged (or not) by human reasoning. The sad fact is that this is half-true - we get messages from God wrong all the time, in our own lives. The lie that exists in the insinuation is that the Bible is merely man's message to man, about a Supreme Being (who may or may not exist).

Can you make up your own interpretation and base it on the Bible? Of course, people do it all the time. Will it be accurate? No.

Another lie that people give in to is the "beauty" of re-interpretation. Somehow, we are supposed to believe that confusion and 20 different meanings that conflict with each other is a 'wonderful' human trait. If you find yourself slogging through an English-teacher approved book that makes you think about broken buildings and failed relationships and the continual drip-drip-drip of grey rain - you're supposed to end the novel gloomily satisfied that the human life is deep and vast and its purposes unknowable. When faced with an obstacle, armed with this depressing knowledge, you can stare at it hollowly and think about how all life leads to chaos and fear.

Variety is surely the spice of life, but if you don't know which spice to use, the sauce you are making will taste like ashes. And that's what Satan wants - ashes out of people's lives. But he constantly tells you that if you just push past this or that barrier, All Glory Will Be Revealed.

God's messages are clear, though hard to understand (it comforts me to know the Apostle Peter found it difficult, too). Swimming through this world's murk and fog isn't glorious, but it's work we've been given - until we get to go Home. Light abounding. Grace eternal. Life unending. No sign of brokenness or failure or sickness anywhere - and a depth of understanding we can't imagine now. What are Satan's promises when compared with that?

Colorless - Review of Fifty Shades of Grey

Sin is so boring.

Honestly, sometimes Satan uses all his powers to tempt you and you realize it in time ("aha! I see what you're up to!") but it really draws you. Sometimes, he uses things that a child would see through. ("Honestly, I'm supposed to be lured down a dark alleyway for that?! Get real.")

That's what I think of "Fifty Shades of Grey". Get real.

Fifty Shades of Grey by E.L. James

My rating: 1 of 5 stars


After 2 chapters, I'd rather read "Twilight" - better character and plot development. Temptation, try again!



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Similarity to Twilight

Have I read through the entire book? No, but enough chapters to know that Twilight author Stephanie Meyer surpasses this writer in plot and character development. Google Preview is an amazing tool!

Firstly, there's the Beautiful Alluring....Male. Secondly, there's the appealing Girl Next Door who's a bit clumsy, awkward and unsure of herself. (This one happens to be at university.) She's drawn by some sort of animal attraction she can't explain, he's the hunter and she's the hunted, and she barely escapes from initial contact with her soul intact. It's a downward ski slope from there.

Writing Ability

There are some smut authors who really can write. Take Anne Rice (pre-Christian days) or Francine Rivers (also pre-Christian days) - they produce characters of intrigue and mystery that make you want to turn pages, to find out what happens next. Honore de Balzac would be another - just because you're a classic smut author from days gone by doesn't make the material any better.

"Fifty Shades" is a normal writing ability, not anything out of which New York Times bestsellers should spring - unless their quality has seriously fallen off in recent years. But it's almost as if the author took a tutorial from Writers Digest on romance novel-writing, plugged in various adjectives for "attractive", and decided that the last names ought to really twist things up and yet co mingle perfectly. ("Grey" and "Steele", get it?)

Confusion

By chapter 2, it seems that Ana Steele's inner good sense has been overshadowed by pair of grey eyes. (How on earth can someone have 'bright grey eyes'? Grey is the color of clouds and confusion.) It's obvious she has Daddy Issues - any two-bit psychologist can see that her mother is a serial monogamist with 3 ex-husbands, rather like Bella's mother Rene in Twilight. Ana is all seeming pragmatic stability on the outside, but a seething cauldron of subconscious fight-or-flight responses that would be easy to tap by the right source. It's a build-up to the need for Christian Grey (why did the author pick that first name?) to dominate, and her need to be dominated. Scene set. Lights, camera, action.

There's no more explanation as to why Mr. Grey is so alluring than the eternally overprotective Edward. Sure, he's rich, he's built up a fabulous empire with a great deal of workers at a young age....Business Tycoon meets Secretary Type. It's no more apparent here than in Twilight, why Mr. Grey - with all of his power and influence - is drawn to Ana Steele than why Edward is drawn to Bella. Normalcy? Overcoming her feeble resistance? Who knows.

Temptation, try again.

Review: The Saint in New York

So here's my official Goodreads review of Leslie Charteris' novel:

 The Saint In New York by Leslie Charteris

My rating: 4 of 5 stars


Worth more than a look. No swearing, no 'scenes', historical relevance about the problems of graft and corruption...and how to clean it up.



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Leslie has powers of detachment in description that haven't appeared in fiction for a good many years. There's something quite attractive in a character who's able to describe a bad American cigarette as "a sin against nicotine", whether or not you indulge personally. Historical anachronisms are even more fun, such as gangsters' molls: "it is a curious fact that few of the men who shoot their way through amazing wealth to sophistication in almost all their appetites ever acquire a sophisticated taste in femininity."

Are there too many descriptions of the Saint's amazing powers of mockery and trickery? Yes. Do we get the idea after the third repetition about the dangerous glittering blue eyes, that the Saint is...well....dangerous? Quite so. But every once in a while, the flower of genius blossoms out. This bit on prejudice and the helpless feeling of a good citizen is so currently apt, it shouldn't be glossed over.

(Regarding Mr. Ezekiel Inselheim) "Confronted by that shamelessly Semitic proboscis, no well-trained Nazi could ever have been induced to believe that he was a kindly and honest man, shrewd without duplicity, self-made without arrogance, wealthy without offensive ostentation. It has always been difficult for such wild possibilities to percolate into the atrophied brain-cells of second-rate crusaders, and a thousand years of self-styled civilization have made no more improvements in the Nordic crank than they have in any other type of malignant half-wit."

Can you beat that for clarity? I'm sure no one of Leslie's public were in any suspense as to his scathing views on Nazism.

"Ezekiel Inselheim was wondering, as others no less rich and famous had wondered before him, why it was that in the most materially civilised country in the world an honoured and peaceful citizen had still to pay toll to a clique of organized bandits, like medieval peasants meeting the extortions of a feudal barony...He knew, as all America knew, that with upright legislators, with incorruptible police and judiciary, the gangster would long ago have vanished like the Western bad man. He knew that without the passive co-operation of a resigned and leaderless public, without the inbred cowardice of a terrorised population, the racketeers and the grafting political leaders who protected them could have been wiped off the face of the American landscape at a cost of one hundredth part of the tribute which they exacted annually."

God has many great attributes, but one of my favourites is His absolute justice. It's not enough for Him to exact punishment for a short time - but for eternity. When thinking of corrupt politicians and crooked leaders, it gives me great satisfaction that they shall either be broken on the Rock and repent (therefore becoming entirely new creatures), or just broken. Either way, glory be to Him!

Communism and Diets

There's a famous book on "100 Books to Read Before Death" that you've probably never heard of: Whittaker Chambers' "Witness". (Not the Harrison Ford movie.)

Chambers was one of those quiet people who see quite clearly, before most people do, that Western civilization is headed for a rough downhill slide. He joined the underground Communist movement in the 1930's, when people thought it was cool - long before Ronald Reagan helped expose the "agrarian reformers" for what they are. A serious atheist, he got shaken by God and repented - became a Quaker. He spent 10 years as a Time editor, then sorrowfully informed on his former comrades. This quote of his always gets me:

"No one knows so well as the ex-Communist the character of the conflict, and of the enemy, or shares so deeply the same power of faith and willingness to stake his life on his beliefs. For no other has seen so deeply into the total nature of the evil with which Communism threatens mankind. Counterrevolution and conservatism have little in common. In the struggle against Communism the conservative is all but helpless. For that struggle cannot be fought, much less won, or even understood, except in terms of total sacrifice. And the conservative is suspicious of sacrifice; he wishes first to conserve, above all what he is and what he has. You cannot fight against revolutions so."

There's a funny truth about change - no matter what you tell yourself, you know when you're all in and when you're still just playing around. (For more clarification on "not playing games", listen to an Andrew Quigley sermon.) You know it's death when you try to compromise: "Well, I'll just listen to the snake for a little bit." Whether it's applying yourself to work or to really shaving off pounds on that diet you've always meant to do, it takes time and frustration and some suffering. Sometimes, a lot of suffering. And nobody wants to hear that.

Diets are horrible. You don't get to eat what you want. You have to go trudge around a hill or a track or get on that exercise bike, whether you feel like it or not - because if you don't, those unwanted pounds hurl themselves at you and latch on. Every once in a while, it's really enjoyable - when you hit a goal, when you fit into those pants, the joy of having a friend say "you've lost some weight! You look good!" SCORE!!! you think. "Every day should be like this!" That's not reality.

Communism got popular, and still is, because people want to refuse to see sin for the horrible, degrading, grimy fact that Adam and Eve landed us in centuries ago. We'd all LIKE to believe that our fellow man is really good inside. We'd LIKE to believe that our neighbors will not lie, cheat, steal, or inform on us - or vice versa - and that we will always be true to our ideals. Weight is the same. A little fudge here, a little lack of exercise there, a donut or three in the mornings - "so shall thy calories come on thee like a robber, and thy want like an armed man".

Okay, so the battle against pounds is not that grim, and there is joy along the way! But it is true that if you "faint in the day of adversity, your strength is small". (Proverbs 24) God is Lord of many small beginnings, it's true - trodging is a learned art. When battling anything - even as earthly as the body - it's good to pray for help at the point of the fridge or the prison gate. But wishing to win and also to conserve comfort is a laughable lie.

The Benefits of Suffering

It's one of those days today, when all the divine signposts are pointing the same way, and I really don't want to go down their suggested path.

C.S. Lewis' "The Problem of Pain" does indeed explore the question of a good God in a horrible world, but one of the chapters particularly explores why it's necessary for humans to grasp pain's necessity. Mostly, Lewis knows man's tendency - to constantly ascribe issues to forces outside of himself, and make them the problem, instead of looking inward for the issues and upward for the solution.

His chapter on "Fallen Man" reminds me why I don't read the book that often, but the chapters on "Human Pain" contain wisdom beyond the popular quote, "[Pain] is God's megaphone to rouse a deaf world". There's the graphic description of real childhood issues: "the bitter, prolonged rage at every thwarting, the burst of passionate tears, the black, Satanic wish to kill or die rather than to give in". An honest adult, reading that, will remember a time when that desire to act childlike (in that sense) has resurfaced, and not too long ago. For me, it was just today.

God often promises things that I'd rather see than hear about, because I'd rather receive and go on about 'my business' than ask, only to hear Him say, "that would be good but this is better for you right now". Lewis speaks about this 'second level' convincingly, and it's at this moment that I wish he were not so articulate. "If the first and lowest operation of pain shatters the illusion that all is well, the second shatters the illusion that what we have, whether good or bad in itself, is our own and enough for us...What then can God do in our interests but make 'our own life' less agreeable to us, and take away the plausible sources of false happiness?"

Lewis is right in explaining that at the back of our minds lurks the false hope in a God who acts more like a "senile benevolence" who likes to see His creatures just enjoying themselves. That would mean He must ignore our sin and the effects of sin on our world, just as we would like to ignore it and walk on in happy ignorance. We would rather not be made 'perfect by suffering', and our Lord Himself asked to be let off of the most painful experience on this earth. Christ's equal wish to submit in obedience to the Father's will is not as palatable. If left to myself, I would act as the puppy in Lewis' illustration: "Let Him but sheathe the sword for a moment and I behave like a puppy when the hated bath is over - I shake myself as dry as I can and race off to reacquire my comfortable dirtiness".

Confusion between God's methods and God's intent makes it hard to distinguish between His use of pain and suffering, to bring us to Himself, and the fact that they are not good in and of themselves. Hence the dark voice that whispers to us, 'well, if suffering is so great, why not do God's work for Him, and use it on others instead of waiting for them to use it on us?' "What is good in any painful experience is, for the sufferer, his submission to the will of God, and, for the spectators, the compassion aroused and the acts of mercy to which it leads...Now the fact that God can make complex good out of simple evil does not excuse - though by mercy it may save - those who do the simple evil." And then the kicker: "If you do [Satan's] work, you must be prepared for his wages."

So when I took a break and picked up Charles Spurgeon's "Power in the Blood", it was really to avoid more points on the benefits of the "rebel will" being broken to God's purposes. The first chapter's title destroyed that hope: "Healing by the Stripes of Jesus". Then the innocent pen on my dresser: "Do not be afraid...." (Luke 12:32) That's where I go when I'd like to ignore God's signposts - into a tailspin of fear, control, and mastery of my own course. All useless nonsense, but a powerful temptation. The cure? Keep reading, and resist. It will flee soon. Temptation doesn't stick around for rejection. That's why God's love is so amazing.

Pin's 2012 Book List

Hopefully, this list will become famous - more so than the fictional BBC list, featuring both "Chronicles of Narnia" and "The Lion, the Witch & the Wardrobe". Unnecessarily raunchy "classic" literature has been weeded out - stuff blacklisted 100 years ago - and focused on those Must Reads for which I've never made time. Since I'd have to read 3 classic books per week to finish in a year, I'm giving myself 3 years. One book per week-and-a-half, with an annual 2 weeks off for good behavior. Some are "shoulds", some are "wants", some are "weird selection from Mum's bookshelves", but they're nearly all upwards of 50 years old...and some are very long.

1. Pudd'nhead Wilson - Mark Twain
2. Ulysses - James Joyce
3. Le Morte D'Arthur
4. Gulliver's Travels - Jonathan Swift
5. John Calvin's Institutes - John Calvin
6. The Voyage Out - Virginia Woolf
7. Don Quixote - Miguel de Cervantes
8. The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
9. The Ox-Bow Incident - Walter Van Tilburg Clark
10. The Red Badge of Courage - Stephen Crane
11. The Autobiography of Miss Jane Pittman - Ernest Gaines
12. Moby Dick - Herman Melville
13. Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
14. Lord Jim- Joseph Conrad
15. Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
16. Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
17. The Death of Artemio Cruz - Carlos Fuentes
18. Lord of the Flies - William Golding
19. Death in Venice - Thomas Mann
20. The Stranger - Albert Camus
21. Cry, the Beloved Country - Alan Paton
22. All Quiet On The Western Front - Erich Maria Remarque
23. Frankenstein - Mary Shelley
24. Madame Curie - Eve Curie
25. Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee - Dee Brown
26. The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin - Benjamin Franklin
27. The Republic - Plato
28. Democracy in America - Alexis de Toqueville
29. Wealth of Nations- Adam Smith
30. Gulag Archipelago - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn (3)
31. Meditations - Marcus Aurelius
32. The Origin of Species - Charles Darwin
33. Doctor Faustus - Christopher Marlowe
34. Death of a Salesman - Arthur Miller
35. The Complete Poetry of John Donne - John Donne
36. The Divine Comedy - Dante Alighieri
37. Dracula - Bram Stoker
38. Catch-22 - Joseph Heller
39. War & Peace - Leo Tolstoy
40. Phineas Finn - Anthony Trollope
41. The Hiding Place - Corrie Ten Boom
42. Tortured For Christ - Richard Wurmbrand
43. A Man Called Peter - Catherine Marshall
44. The Martian Chronicles - Ray Bradbury
45. McGuffey's Fifth Eclectic Reader - New American Library
46. In Six Days - edited by John Ashton
47. The Brothers Karamazov - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
48. East of Eden - John Steinbeck
49. The Iliad - Homer
50. Twenty Thousand Leagues Under The Sea - Jules Verne
51. Invisble Man - Ralph Ellison
52. The Aeneid - Virgil
53. Paradise Lost - John Milton
54. Narrative of the Life of Frederick Douglass - Frederick Douglass
55. The Art of War - Sun Tzu
56. My Name is Asher Lev - Chaim Potok
57. She - Rider Haggard
58. The Phantom of the Opera - Gaston Leroux
59. Winnie-the-Pooh - A.A. Milne
60. The Maltese Falcon - Dashiell Hammett
61. The Rime of the Ancient Mariner - Samuel Taylor Coleridge
62. The Red and the Black - Roger Stendal
63. The Mill on the Floss - George Eliot
64. Rob Roy - Sir Walter Scott
65. The Book of Mormon - Joseph Smith
66. Dombey and Son - Charles Dickens
67. Don Juan - George Gordon Byron
68. Kristin Lavransdatter - Sigrid Undset
69. Mary Poppins - P.L. Travers
70. Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh
71. Metamorphoses - Ovid
72. Moll Flanders - Daniel Defoe
73. Life of Samuel Johnson - James Boswell
74. The Silmarillion - J.R.R. Tolkien
75. The History of Tom Jones, A Foundling - Henry Fielding
76. Confessions of an English Opium Eater - Thomas de Quincy
77. Peter Pan - J.M. Barrie
78. Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day - Winifred Watson
79. Drinking With Calvin & Luther - Jim West
80. An Incomplete Education - Judy Jones & William Wilson
81. A History of Ireland - Mike Cronin
82. The Nibelungenlied - Heritage Press Translation
83. The Travels of Marco Polo - Werner Forman & Cottie Burland
84. Simon Schama's History of Britain (3)
85. Desiring God - John Piper
86. Jews, God and History - Max Dimont
87. David Livingstone - T. Banks Maclachlan
88. Thomas Guthrie - Oliphant Smeaton
89. What the Bible Teaches About Marriage - Anthony Selvaggio
90. The True Bounds of Christian Freedom - Samuel Bolton
91. From Jerusalem to Irian Jaya - Ruth Tucker
92. The Excellent Wife - Martha Peace
93. Death in the City - Francis Schaeffer
94. He Is There and He Is Not Silent - Francis Schaeffer
95. The World of Patience Gromes - Scott C. Davis
96. Life's Handicap - Rudyard Kipling
97. The Fisherman's Lady - George MacDonald
98. A Light in the Window - Jan Karon
99. The Face Is Familiar - Ogden Nash
100. The Man Who Never Was - Ewen Montagu

A Mercenary For Christ

Drinking coffee and reading the Gospel of Luke would be therapeutic this morning, I thought. And then I came across this passage: (Luke 14)

"25 Now great multitudes went with Him. And He turned and said to them, 26 “If anyone comes to Me and does not hate his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and his own life also, he cannot be My disciple. 27 And whoever does not bear his cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple. 28 For which of you, intending to build a tower, does not sit down first and count the cost, whether he has enough to finish it— 29 lest, after he has laid the foundation, and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, 30 saying, ‘This man began to build and was not able to finish’? 31 Or what king, going to make war against another king, does not sit down first and consider whether he is able with ten thousand to meet him who comes against him with twenty thousand? 32 Or else, while the other is still a great way off, he sends a delegation and asks conditions of peace. 33 So likewise, whoever of you does not forsake all that he has cannot be My disciple."

Sure, I've heard this before and thought 'Yes, yes, I need to remember the sacrifice required of disciples' - as I go on about my work of the day. It's not so much that I counted the cost of the kingdom before I entered; I saw the cost of NOT getting into the kingdom, and it scared the hell (literally) out of me, and I came to Him trembling. Rather like Peter - "Lord, where else shall we go to hear the word of truth?"

Mercenaries are paid soldiers - those who see the benefit of becoming paid assassins. They have no loyalty to any particular country or group, and would cheerfully pack a bag of weapons for whichever group pays them the most. Real soldiers, who spend their lives in defense of their people, their homes and their principles, in order to build something great, despise mercenaries to the bottom of their soul. It's rather like seeing a prostitute with regular customers, claim to be a 'wife'. Any real wife who'd made a real commitment would want to throw up, hearing that kind of nonsense. (For a modern-day example, see Steven Seagal's contempt in Under Siege for the kid who joins the Navy 'on the college program'.)

Sometimes, it hits me that I'm acting like a mercenary for Christ. Unlike a real soldier, I grouse at doing exercises that will prepare me for real battle. Unlike a real soldier, I complain that the rewards aren't big enough, and don't believe my commander(s) when it's said that our rewards in Heaven will be great. I want rewards NOW. I want to be paid now. If Christ really did require me to leave lands and family for Him, simply so that He might be honored, He'd hear about it from me. I'd be like the Persistent Widow, only not in a just cause - solely for my own benefit. Preparing for the Sabbath often finds me wondering "why should I? What's in it for me? Do I have to serve....again?! Didn't You say that Your burden would be light?!"

My sister Karen gave me a plaid pillow to hug when I have these momentary feelings. Taken from Calvin & Hobbes, the script reads - "Haven't I suffered enough?! Where will it all end?" She didn't mean for me to do the Martyr Walk through life, only to hug it (or throw it) when the mood is upon me, and go on about my life after laughing at my own dramatic nature.

DJ calls it "the one-eyed Me Monster". Like the Cyclops, it's ugly and has only a single focus: Self. Yes, intellectually, every Christian knows that one ought to be about Kingdom Business, serve others more than you do yourself, and sacrifice as He did. Quite often, we're made to give up small comforts rather than great things. Like Naaman (II Kings 5), it seems harder to give up pride and dip into a silly river for seven silly turns because a silly prophet told us, rather than be asked to do "some great thing" in order that our spiritual leprosy can be healed. That way, we could say, "Sure, the leprosy went away, but guess what I had to do for it to disappear!" We could be proud of our own contribution then.

So where does that passage in Luke lead? Should I hop in the Red Roadrunner, wave a cheery goodbye to family and friends, and tell them "I'm off to Africa to serve Jesus"? (Should I also bring that worthy continent my unwanted leftovers?) If every one of us would "forsake all that he has", who on earth would be left to build churches, extend hospitality, have bread to break with others, or send aid to our overseas workers?

The previous "Parable of the Great Supper" points out a common human flaw: excuses. The new oxen, the new wife, the new land is taking up all the thoughts and energies of those invited to the Great Supper. 'Put those aside', Jesus says daily, 'and look at Me. All these things WILL be added unto you. I gave them in the first place.'

The Beauty of Time

Time is such an amazing commodity when invested well!

If it's one thing on which Reformed Christians focus well, it's sin. Andrew Quigley preached an amazing sermon series at a Horn Creek conference on the stunningly underrepresented topic of sin, and it go me thinking. Humans have wandered the desert landscape of a sin-saturated earth for thousands of years, blazing away a small fraction of their lives in either cleaning up from, or digging deeper into, the nature of Adam & Eve's attempt at a shortcut. Jesus didn't take it from Satan in the desert, but they wanted wisdom and power faster than God promised. And boy, did they pass on their shortcutting habits!

There's a passage in C.S. Lewis' That Hideous Strength that indicates Merlin's bi-polar society - he can go from blubbering like a child to sitting calmly without any embarrassment whatsoever. Lewis knew that a split society is marginally effective. What he would have deplored is our current desperation to be continually fractured, in a frantic effort to 'make much of time'.

Making yourself be still can be a hard thing - yoga classes call it being 'centred'. But without stillness, the gift of time can be turned into a Mansfield Park array of "a quick succession of busy nothings". And that means you spend your life chasing your tail, with others to clear away the damage as you lumber through fences and signposts and china shops, like a blind bull. As Ezra and Nehemiah found out, clearing away the rubbish of a city's broken wall takes an enormous amount of focused energy - and time. Let alone building a new wall.

Austen and Lewis knew that a life spent in swift toil in service of the Enemy was nothing more than time lost. They outline the heartbreaking lack of preparation of children by parents, focus spent on fripperies, people eating and drinking and making merry til death. And then the contrast, of those who have learned the wisdom of avoidance of 'bad company', who value true friendship in strange packages (such as Miss Bates!), and wise financial investments in the eternal. This thrift pays dividends, such as a tree made into a wardrobe that opens into a magic world.

We all know that to invest in certain things, such as exercise and Eating Right, pays dividends. You can force yourself out the door to puff around the block in the comforting reflection that it's good for your heart and burns calories. Burning brain calories is a bit harder, and less visible - and much more satisfying. Investment in the invisible often pays well.

Good time spent means preparation - I can now pack for a week-long trip in an hour. Everything's been put away in its place, or in a bag. I can type out a review of a book in half a day instead of five days (like in my freshman year of college) because I've done it 200 times before. I can have a conversation about the gospel and be convincing, because I've fallen on my face trying to present it 100 times before. I can plot the course of a film because I've seen 1,000 of them. (That's not really something to be proud of!) I can walk into a house and figure out how to approach the difficult dog inside of 10 minutes because I've petsit at 30 different places. But each time, I have to allow time to figure out what will be puzzling, and make mistakes.

Thank God, in heaven we will have all the time in the world, and none of it will be wasted on the world. :)

A Useful Occupation

Most of us, at some time or another, wish we didn't have a job. Adam wished that as soon as weeds started to grow in Paradise, no doubt.

But consider what life would really be like if we had nothing that we HAD to do. What would happen to our time? Would we spend endless hours searching for amusement among each other, spend time making social calls and hosting dinner parties with no real purpose, other than to while away the long hours and keep boredom at bay?

Anna Karenina is one of my favourite books - not because of the horrors of the slow moral decay of a woman given to adultery, but because of the wealth of detail that Tolstoy uses to describe a privileged people. The noble Russians under the czars were apparently a nation of playboys, and girls, spending most of their time in useless wranglings over forms of entertainment, having nothing better to do than to see and speak of "some new thing", as the Greeks did at the Areopagus. These idle Russians spent hours on playing cards, seeing new theatrical stars, creating drama between each other (if there was no other form of amusement), visiting and comparing houses, taking lavish vacations to summer or winter homes, having affairs - and getting into luxurious debt. Sounds rather familiar, doesn't it?

Of course, Tolstoy doesn't shirk a candid look at the glorious peasants, either - who have a great deal of virtues and the same number of vices. They don't want to work hard at learning new tasks, are continually convinced that their masters are out to 'get them' even when fair wages are paid, break new tools because they're fearfully unfamiliar, and constantly excuse their shoddy work by saying that it's 'just the way things are' - using God as an excuse for their lack of effort. Their best faces show either at home, where they can be the lords and masters, or under pressure at harvest time - because it's been that way for many years, and there's comfort in peaceful stability. Sounds rather familiar, doesn't it?

Petsitting often reminds me that we were created for a purpose. Without the normal occupation of sheep-herding, bird-pointing or hunting down rabbits in wild fields, pet dogs often lead an uneventful and rather bored existence. They bark at everything passing the window because it's a break from routine, and because they have nothing to do. Going on a walk and eating are their favourite exercises - nearly their only exercises. Instead of being able to trail around with their masters on a farm (where they could chase cats or hunt rats in the barn without upsetting anyone), they get yelled at when they act up, because they are a form of amusement instead of a useful member of society with specified tasks.

Cats are the same - instead of being able to hunt down pests or spend hours in trees waiting to leap upon their prey, they sit at windows and stare at passers-by.....with unblinking feral eyes. They have fights with each other simply to have some excitement. They try to eat curtains, and make messes on rugs, nibble on your hair or lay on your computer keyboard, all to advertise: I'M BORED, PLAY WITH ME!!!! And they're cute for a while, chasing strings and getting themselves wrapped up in your laundry, and rustling in paper bags....but eventually they get to the stage where they just try to sit in the best sunny spots and snarl if you use their favourite cushion. Life would actually be more exciting for them if they had to stay one step ahead of their pursuers. Makes me think of a Simon & Garfunkel song about keeping the customers satisfied: "one step ahead of the shoe-shine, two steps away from the county line...."



There's an interesting warning in Jeremiah 17: "Cursed is the man who trusts in man, and makes flesh his strength, whose heart departs from the Lord. For he shall be like a shrub in the desert, and shall not see when good comes, but shall inhabit the parched places in the wilderness, in a salt land which is not inhabited...those who depart from me shall be written in the earth..."

The difference between people who are doing work to God's glory, and those who are merely filling up their days without purpose, has to do with whether or not they understand what's happening behind the seemingly meaningless tasks. God's character traits of order, cleanliness, beauty, generosity, creativity, magnificence....can all be seen in His created earth. And if we, His small reflections, are merely casting around for ways in which to waste time instead of use it, that seems a crime against His commands and our very natures. That's why people who fritter away existence with gossip and pleasure and 'busy nothings' seem shriveled in soul. If they want the earth that badly, they'll get it - and that's all they'll get. What a waste!

The Unwinnable Scenario

There are words in a woman's vocabulary, besides "we need to talk", that ought to send a thinking man screaming out the door. They are this: "I'm going on a diet."

At first glance, you would think that this would bring joy and delight into a man's heart. Yes, she has said it! And without him having to point out that she has blossomed past the blushing bride of yore! But no. As with most woman things, what is on the surface is farthest from the truth.

The truth is that this woman who sits by him in the car, steely-eyed, vowing that she is by gum NOT going to give in like those other times, no, she really is going to hunker down and do it - get that nasty weight off - is now the Enemy of Fat. Being a new Crusader, she hunts it down and makes it scream for mercy - but not just in her own life. Now conversations with friends and neighbors will focus on this topic, and with herself in the mirror ("THINK before you eat that ice cream bar, for heaven's sake!!"). So instead of enjoying evenings of comfort with his wife on the couch, watching harmless re-runs of "CSI" or "The Ghost Weeper" to make her happy - no, he's got to hear huffing and puffing as she flings his favorite drinks and snacks out of cupboard and fridge. These are grunts of anger and war, and though she may say it tactfully (she is a good wife), there will be sideways comments for him as well. "Do you know how many calories are in that soda?" or the educational kiss of death: "Did you know that in some cultures, tofu is considered just as good as meat? I think we should go international today."

For women are never content to do anything just by themselves. Men comment on this when women go in a gaggle to the bathroom, or when they can't even go outside in a simple dress without hailing a passer-by for an opinion.....if they can't get it at home, that's always an option. "HEY! You there! Should I wear the red flats or the black sandals?" Somehow, men don't realize that this togetherness trend never ends.

Unlike when she gets pregnant, there will be no great advantage when the diet ends, because it never does. Instead of a pregnancy giving way to a bouncing happy child after nine months of labour, the diet never ends and never produces anything other than a thinner wife. But even then, the future fear of putting the weight back on is ever-present. The child is at least a form of entertainment, whereas diets often mean that entertainment and jollity must be put on hold for extra mood swings and black looks at Burger King signs. Not to mention crying. ("I STILL can't fit into that dress!!!")

And men, you already know that you can't stop her. Even if you try to tell her that she looks fine and doesn't NEED to diet, she will counter with feelings ("but I don't FEEL fine!"), personal projections ("I saw you looking at that thin girl in the mall!"), challenges ("Are you saying you don't think I can do it?") or silence while she thinks all these things but refuses to say them. So as a female, I release you to give a hearty "Amen" to your wife's project: "I think that's great, honey, you go ahead and do that."

But don't you dare say that in my presence. Man, have you NO sense?! I'm going on a diet.

Scales Hatred

"I hate the scales. They mock me."

So said a good friend of mine today, when we were discussing the issues of non-svelteness. We used to be skinny, and the moan of the world has now become our tune: If only.

If only we didn't have to spend time exercising that feels pointless anyway, continually read Scripture just so we can forget the best verses in conversation (those ones that would force others to change their view), or do the daily disciplines of deodorant and dish-washing, we'd have a lot more free time. Of course, every time that I DO get all virtuous and go exercising, and then hop on the scale to See My Progress, I'm horribly disappointed. The scale's monologue goes something like this:

'Haha! See if you can move me! It's impossible! Now go eat an ice cream bar out of resigned indifference!'

Oddly enough, the same voice pops up when I want to read Scripture or engage in prayer. Only, instead of ice cream bars, the carrot that is dangled (what an incentive, if you're a donkey) is more like the Necessity of Projects. When I have my teeth brushed and my face washed and I'm all tucked into a holy posture for prayer - that's when it 'suddenly' occurs to me that laundry has not been done, thank-you cards not written, and by gum I need to make sure that the bank has really taken care of the bills on BillPay. None of these things can possibly wait until after I speak with the Lord of the Universe, who has plenty of time for creating new species and sorting out issues of world hunger, but none at all for my piddly details of existence. Sure, He loves me and all, but as a good Reformed sort I'm firmly convinced in my heart of hearts that there are limits to His love. "After all", I reason, "it doesn't do to tick Him off. Perhaps when I go to pray, He's feeling like incinerating me for aiming swear words at the minister in my head on the Sabbath. While I do these chores, I shall ponder the paths of my feet, and restrain the Lord from turning me into a pile of salt. Obviously if I go talk to Him, I've got to be perfectly prepared."

This idea of Perfect Preparation works really well until you have a real issue, such as confronted David when on the run from Saul, or Solomon's insights into the folly of his own building efforts (Psalm 127), or the captives in Babylon. Then all the piddly details of existence can go hang while you go talk to your Father, pouring out your heart to Him - and when that's over, somehow everything gets allocated to its proper place. Sure, you're still a slave, but you can at least sing a song of Zion under your breath and keep hoping for the day of the Lord when your enemies get paid back in full. (Those Psalms are especially satisfying after listening to political news reports.)

My minister said something of profound import this Sabbath about scales. Two of our church visitors are professional musicians, and they still spend significant amounts of time on scales - boring, repetitive, finger-limbering scales. He equated it to our spiritual disciplines: praying, reading the Word, listening to the Pastor speak. (We all had a laugh at this last barb to the children, who get a little restless in lifting their longing eyes to the clock, from whence comes salvation from long sermons.)

Repeated actions seem like a completely inefficient time-swamp. You can throw in hours of laundry and car repair and mending of clothes, the Time Swamp will swallow them all and greedily open its maw for more. (The horse-leech hath four daughters, crying 'Give! Give!) God requires us to wend our way through the swamp, just like Frodo and Sam on their way to Mordor, occasionally staring at dead faces of those who got sucked into the swamp along the way. He requires us to throw tithe into the collection plate to pay for endless amounts of church supplies and salaries; He requires us to spend hours praying and reading His word, and for what? So that the wicked can keep merrily squashing us and then asking us "well, where is He?" And some of us sure feel like asking Him the same question, since He doesn't seem in a hurry to answer our neediest prayers.

But C.S. Lewis is right - pain is the gift that nobody wants - the pain of 'wasted time', the pain of year after year of weary playing of spiritual scales, the 'what's the use' feeling that we fight. After years of blows on our rock-hard forms like an artist's hammer-blows on marble, the things that hurt us so much (little or great) are those which turn our image to something resembling Christ. And that consummation is devoutly to be wished.